sunflower

Wonderful isn't it?

The Echelon

"Some people ask us if this is a cult; I say this: It's something special. It's not for everyone - it's only for those who understand."

Rebel Yell Wolf

 Killer madame, murder, the like. Its all written on paper.
I think its time I closed a chapter from my life and open a new one. I won't be made the fool anymore and I'm just tired of the troubles. No one knows what I been through. The physical and emotional pain. I been through it all. You name it I been through it. And I'm too tiny for all this I can't handle it. No matter the hardships I had to face I WILL NEVER GET USE TO IT because I know there's better. And I refuse to have some idiot change my views and manipulate the way I feel or think. I'm too smart for this. Can't you tell I don't give a fuck anymore? You pushed my little buttons. I didn't shed a tear. I have no emotion, no remorse not a feeling nor a care in the world. "DONT CRY OVER SPILT MELK" trying to leave on a good note.

Hurricane Irene

On August 23 there was an earthquake I didn't technically feel. I only suffered a headache. It actually occurred in Virginia but people felt it here in NY. I guess I didn't feel it because I was moving back and forth in a rush putting my bag together to get out the house.


On August 24 after work I find out my mothers country Peru also suffered from an earthquake. A bigger one then here. It was Northern Peru the jungles, Pucallpa and Brazil. My grandmother is in Pucallpa as well as countless cousins and other relatives. I haven't heard from them. I hope everyone's ok.

August 25 mom comes in my room and tells me to pack an emergency bag. I knew of a storm coming but  I didn't think it was such a big deal I didn't want to pack. I believed she was exaggerating. We had to food shop and stock up many many necessities. I was beginning to get a headache. Had a very interesting and long conversation with two friends I've known for half my life. And although we don't hangout anymore it would be like old times, like time hasn't passed. Just standing in the rain talking. And then it all goes downhill from here. Not stressing it so I refuse to discuss it.

August 26 Today meanwhile I was working I was watching the spanish news and it showed a fiery meteor flying down from the sky in Peru somewhere. They didn't say when it happened but they don't know where it crashed. Interesting. Nothings changed I'm still trying to pack, preparing for the worst but hoping for the best. They say it'll die down by the time it reaches us but you never know. They keep saying its going to be "Historic" we shall see. Just hope all animals are safe especially this kitten I couldn't catch but been feeding. His names Rolex I'll pray he'll survive. <3

young and beautiful

Bare beauty. Natural beauty. No make-up just a clean and pure face. Laying here writing with tired eyes listening to the commotion in the other room.

When dreams collide

 I had the dream again. I dreamed of having a daughter and her name was Marisol. She was about 2-3 years old.I had a dream like this ONE time before a couple of months back. Only this time we were in a pizza shop picking up an order. Although we don't seem to EVER leave there.We talked and laughed and loved it. I loved her so much I didn't want to let her go I always wanted to hold her. I wonder what this means...

"See I fell asleep and I had a dream, It was all black everything"

brown paper bag

NORMAL? I'LL SHOW YOU NORMAL!!!

I am completely and utterly insane. The only thing who can keep me sane is my cat. A creature. Opposites do attract you know. I mean who wants to be with an angry person if you're a madman yourself? You need someone to help pull you out of your misery, not sit there with you. Why do we always give out good advice and never seem to follow our own words? I doubt myself a lot because I'm afraid of failure.

Everythings Purple

I'm gonna need those Jeremy Scott's Adidas ASAP Rocky has on his feet & I need them in a size 2 -_-

Run deep Run wild

Sooner then later we will make 5 years. Oh how these coming months will be hard. Nothing comes easy. So many people doubted us. So many hated us but they're just going to have to get use to us. And now I see other couples who were kind of, sort of around us, doing what we're doing. And its all quite simple you see, its just showing attention, giving affection. They use to never do it NOT EVER and now they are hmm.
Even though its going to be five years I still feel like we haven't been together  long enough. People don't know shit when they start dating someone new. Its all fresh. You're not in love in a matter of 2 weeks. There's so much to learn from love, gain from it and do with it. A lot of people are together for all the wrong reasons. I'm glad that no matter the circumstance, no matter the shit I had to go through or the devastation's I've faced I was able to pull through. Even if I felt alone I was never really alone. I just look at this as a learning experience and no matter how long I been with him I'm still learning new things about him everyday. Whether I agree or not our love hasn't died. There have been times where I questioned us and if he's really for me. I think it will always be in the back of my mind but I still miss him so much if I don't see him for like 2 days. Being in his arms is so comforting and its where I belong.

Play me a tune

My mom tried to trick me into eating a bloody sausage. For some reason I thought it was like a weird brownie. I don't know wtf is wrong with me lol BUT thankfully I DENIED DENIED DENIED! but other than that I been playing the piano lately like a madman. Pretty damn proud of it too! >:] Made up a song. Too bad I have a hard time uploading videos I would've uploaded it. Beethoven is my go to for Tragedy you should take a listen.

ooh la love

I'm so little yet I eat like a man. I don't know who the hell I think I am. Its been raining all friggin day & I'm NOT complaining. I feel like having coffee and I don't drink coffee!! Guys have been annoying me lately >.> Like, if I don't reply to you just leave me alone why are you still trying? Can't you see I don't want to be bothered? Whats the rush? I'm not your obligation. Not like you're saying anything interesting. Its all the same shit. "Hi, how you been?" EVERY SINGLE DAMN TIME. Ok. Ok. nuff about them. Guess I'll be blogging for the rest of the night or until I want to get back to reading. So enjoy the show.

Royal mermaid

Mother bought me a book, she knows me so well because I haven't been able to put it down. A spiritual book. I'm beginning to have a "Spiritual Awakening" I can't explain it. Its amazing. I look at life a whole new way now. Sometimes we just don't have the right words to say how we feel, understand why things are and why you and I are even down here but I will say that Life is beautiful but it can be so fucked up too. Its a learning experience, even if bad shit happens it wouldn't have happened any other way. That's just the way it is. Something happened to me the other night. A sign. Its a shame my boyfriend didn't see it. But something tells me it was just for me to see.

It's all a blurr

I couldn't feel my face. Sad to say I lost my appetite. Had to walk away to fuckin breathe. I was losing my vision and hearing I was buggin the fuck out. Then I puked it all out. -Story of my life :)

All at my fave eatery in New York City.

I will NEVER say where it is because I don't even wanna bump into fools when I want to just get away. Not like its a low key place either because celebs are always popping in and out like babies. Just like Cassie. Can I just say that she is BAD in person. Skinny as she looks but not as tall as everyone made her out to be. IDGAF what anyone says, she's the only one who can pull off this look and lemme just add that she shaved both sides of her head now. Mohawk type ishh.

I LOVE NY

 

People I will never meet. A view I will forever see.

 ASS

ASS

ASS

ASS

SLAP BUTTS, NOT FACES

The End.